New Year's Resolutions: Fulfilling Your Heart's Desires – Part 3: Facing Your Inner Saboteur

BY Parvati

(Continued from “What are the unconscious tendencies that affect your choices?“)
The choices we have made over years have carved the lives we have today. Most of these choices were made unconsciously, until we wake up to the story of our lives. We all carry personal tendencies that shape the way we make our decisions. We can see these tendencies clearly in the way we reacted to our parents. Each one of us has unique interference patterns that thwart our joy. These interference patterns are like an inner saboteur that blocks our ability to live our greatest joy.
We all carry a saboteur within us until we find the courage to befriend ourself and get to know our shadows. When we befriend ourselves, we begin to listen to the full story of our lives: our hopes and dreams, and the scary, painful bits. If we are to fulfill our dreams, we must acknowledge our shadow, which has a huge impact on the shape of our lives. When we befriend ourselves, we listen to the little girl or little boy within that holds secrets to our unfulfilled desires. When we befriend ourselves, we hear our deepest joys and activate the inner courage to realize our true heart’s desires.
An exercise that I include every day in my morning meditation practice helps me get in touch with my saboteur. After I have meditated for some time, I quietly breathe in the feeling, the sensation, the reality that all my heart’s desires are fulfilled. When I first started to do this exercise, I got a sort of blank, “uh, I don’t know”, feeling. After some time, my surface joys started to appear. Then I met layers of frustrations, shame, fear, doubt, rage and pain that were blocking deeper joys. I sat with the interference for some time and allowed myself to welcome it all into my heart, realizing that the interference patterns were created by myself, so they could be healed by myself as well. I quietly watched and let them soften. No fighting.
After some time in this practice, deeper joys began to express themselves. I felt more abundance radiate through my being. I felt more possibility. I started to allow myself to fully feel what the realization of my joys would feel like, how that would affect every aspect of my life and how it would touch everyone in my life. I let myself expand into the fullness of my heart’s desires.
I still do this every day. I love it. I find I learn new things about myself every day and feel it is one way I can get out of my own way so that my inner light can shine. I believe that this visualization is powerful. It helps us get in touch with our most authentic self and clear out gently, painlessly and completely the energies that stand in our way.
It is my belief that the universe patiently awaits us saying a whole hearted “Yes” to our self. All the help we need is right here, welcoming our fullest joy. I believe that the universe conspires not against us, but in support of us. When we say “Yes” to ourselves, we find all the support we need to realize our dreams.
This new year, consider saying “Yes” to yourself and your joys by incorporating this visualization – that all your heart’s desires are fulfilled – for a few minutes every day into your life. If you like, keep a journal beside you as you do it so you may jot down what may arise. Go to the source of what you truly desire and get out of your own way so that you may realize it. This practice sets in motion, at a vibrational level, all the support required for your life to be just as you wish it to be.
May 2012 be your best year yet!
Many blessings to you,
PS: The next Ask Parvati will appear on Sunday, January 8. To have your question included in the random draw, please send it to by Thursday, January 5.