North Pole Journey: Back in Toronto, a dream of the Goddess
The morning of September 30, 2010
The morning after I arrive back home from the North Pole, I wake up having had a most potent dream:
BEING WITH THE GODDESS
I was far north. I had no sense of bearing. I was just very north, looking for my spiritual community. I met the Goddess there in a co-op building with food supplies.
When I saw Her, I was surprised and overjoyed but I did not lose my breath or feel an energy rush as I have in the past when seeing Her. Instead, I felt equal. She was open, present, looking at me just as I was looking at Her.
She embraced me and told me good job, that She was very pleased. She said I must be careful about feeling not enough. This was an impossibilities trickiness tendency and would wear me down to the point of not being able to do this work. I thought of my health and the need to make sure I remain caring of my own physical needs. Then She let me massage Her feet and adore them for a long time.
She spoke to me about my next lessons, that which I am to embody. But it was as though She suddenly spoke in another language. I told Her I did not understand and asked Her to please repeat the teaching. But again the words transformed into a language I could not understand. I told Her so and She said I was not ready yet to know but that She would show me. There is no need to worry. I realized that I thought I knew so much but now I see I know nothing. The immensity of the Goddess!
Her eyes looked wild. I was filled with awe in understanding that I was looking into the eyes of Death. I felt like I had seen that brilliant, dark flash in the eyes of the Inuit hunters. But this was not the flash of darkness I have seen in the eyes of many who call themselves spiritual. When I saw this, I understood and Her eyes became those of the Goddess Kali.
Then She put Herself playfully into a bag of rice, like a child in a placenta. We were giggling together and playing. I picked Her up in the bag and held Her on my lap like a small child. I had a moment of concern that She could not breathe so I opened the bag and stroked Her hair. Though Her body was Her usual size, She was completely weightless. It was as though we merged.
Through this exchange, She had given me a stack of papers that I needed to deliver to the store of my spiritual community. People would value these. I gave them to the store but people were confused. They were expecting money instead of receiving these blessed papers. I did not know what to do. I just knew I had to not be attached and now deal with practical matters. She will show me the next steps.