All posts tagged wanting

How to Succeed at Your New Year’s Resolutions, Part 2: Resolve Rooted in Joy

It has been a busy start for the year for me. Actively working to launch a comprehensive website to embody my work in music, yoga, words and activism early in 2015, I am at the end of a weekend blitz to get the project to completion. You will be seeing the new site very soon! How are you doing with your New Year’s resolutions? Here is the promised conclusion to How To Succeed At Your New Year’s Resolutions. HOW TO SUCCEED AT YOUR NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION (Part 2) Resolve Rooted In Joy In my posting “Wanting Won’t Get You What You Want”, we explored how our ego, which is fuelled by wanting, knows only how to categorize life in likes and dislikes, a bit like permanently judging ourselves and others for what is here right now. We either latch onto something we perceive as good and feel temporarily fulfilled – like “I finally got this perfect boyfriend, so I am now happy” – or we push back at things we don’t like – like “The perfect boyfriend is not being so nice right now, so I am now unhappy”. Is joy happiness? While happiness can come and go depending on circumstances, joy is deeper and more lasting. It is an effervescence that arises like the bubbling…

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How to Succeed at Your New Year’s Resolutions, Part 1: Wanting Won’t Get You What You Want

Thank you to all those who have contacted me to help stop seismic bombing in the Arctic Ocean. So grateful! We are still looking for volunteers who can help with company research, specifically, we are looking to uncover the companies that are invested in profiting from exploiting the Arctic. If you are interested in lending a hand to this work, please contact me directly at parvati@parvati.org. We are working on building a comprehensive website for the great content I have been putting together: videos, music, words and more; as well as a site to represent our work at parvati.org. We should be seeing these live soon. In the meantime, here is some food for thought to help you start your New Year with some extra inspiration: HOW TO SUCCEED AT YOUR NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS WANTING WON’T GET YOU WHAT YOU WANT Many of us want to make lasting changes in our lives. As New Year’s Day comes around, we feel excited about the possibilities it brings. With a wish for better times ahead, we write a list of ways this year will be different. But as life’s challenges return to our lives after festive gaiety, we find ourselves once again feeling stifled by the things we had hoped would be different. Despite our best efforts, it…

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Sacred Sexuality: Beyond Wanting – Part 4: The Body Channel – The Art of Love

(Continued from Wanting Fulfillment or Open to Divine Love) What channel are we choosing to tune into and amplify when we mate? Whatever our state of consciousness at the time of sexual interaction, that consciousness is amplified by the act of sex. If we are wanting, seeking fulfillment and brimming with desire, we will feel satisfied temporarily from our climax, then ultimately feel empty once again and want more. The cycle of wanting then continues.   But if we approach sex from the point of view of the sacred, from a place of mindfulness and a practice of the release of wanting, most guys will say at first that they can’t get it up, and women will not know how to be sexy because they are so used to seducing or playing hard to get. Once the cat and mouse games or prey/predator games fall away, we are left with our naked self, our inner being, raw, vulnerable and real. Ok, you may ask, so what is so sexy about that!? That is when real lovemaking begins.   When we allow ourselves to let go of wanting the other to fill us up, when we let ourselves be real, as we are, another energy comes through our body and being. It will charge our entire being…

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Sacred Sexuality: Beyond Wanting – Part 3: Wanting Fulfillment or Open to Divine Love

(Continued from Body Language) Sex is part of the cycle of life. It is a sacred thing. When the sacred is confused for the fulfillment of desires, confusion begins. The sacred does not fulfill our desires. It does not give us all we want but gives us what we need. The divine shows us the ways in which we identify with feeling disconnected and shows us a way to return to our more authentic state of wholeness. It is not up to our lovers, husbands, wives and partners to make us whole. It is up to us to turn our attention to the divine and tap into that eternal light. It is our job to focus on and celebrate the divine within our partners, and forgive their shadow, as we too have shadows. When we engage in sexuality, it is a time for heightened consciousness, not the release of such. When we let go of our spiritual attention and engage in sexuality, we amplify our already present tendency to want. Whenever there is wanting, there is interference. When we want through sex, we become downloading stations for interference and amplify our own state of disconnection. Though a momentary feeling of bliss through orgasm feels great, most of us have no idea what really went on in…

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Sacred Sexuality: Beyond Wanting – Part 2: Body Language

(Continued from Sex and Spirituality) Whether we are heterosexual, bisexual, homosexual, a polygamist, a monogamist, or celibate, our physical body is part of a vast, multidimensional whole. What we do, think, feel, taste, smell and touch is never limited in isolation to our immediate sense of self, but has ripple effects throughout the entire universe. When we communicate, we take in and impart information. For most, this is thought of as a verbal exchange. But for those who are sensitive to otherness, we understand that there is no such thing as purely verbal information. In addition to what we speak, we are also sharing our emotional presence, all the contents of our body language, the subtle innuendos, and our vibrational intentions. When we share with someone, we are in contact not just with the physical being that we see, but with all that person’s past thoughts, experiences and actions, as well as all energies with which they have been in contact. We are in touch with the totality of their soul’s evolutionary journey. Even when we are physically alone, we are never truly alone. Whatever we think, feel or do, we are continually in communication with an immense universe that comes home to us through our physical body. The body is literally a channel for unseen…

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Wanting and Spiritual Materialism: How Not To Feed The Greed

Wanting and Spiritual Materialism   Over the last couple of weeks, I received a variety of emails from people who read my recent blog entries on Tantra. Some were delighted to have greater clarity on the subject, feeling inspired by the idea of the body as a vehicle for the divine and an opportunity to practice witnessing pitfalls along the path. Others felt confused and upset at the idea that Tantra is not a sexual free-for-all. This pushed the button of their attachment to their libido. Everything that pushes our buttons gives us an opportunity to see ourselves in a new way. Aspects of our shadows are being highlighted for us to see, showing us ways in which we are attached to unfulfilled desires that may be outdated or may need voicing.   We all have unfulfilled desires. Many spiritual environments become a feeding ground for these, where practitioners may be wearing flowing clothes and chanting prayers, but feeling inwardly tied in knots. Wanting is insidious and we must be aware of it – whether we are in the office, following our creative voice, practicing bendy poses on our yoga mats, or exploring sexuality in our bedrooms.   We want. We want more. We get. But it is not enough. So we want more. In a…

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Ask Parvati 41: The Power of the Inner Child – Part 3: Let The Child Take You Home

(Continued from “An Apple in an Orange Grove”)   Recently I was out with a friend in a mall. She was asking me a similar question, feeling a bit stuck with her attachments to her family. I said to her, look around. Beside us is not a 24 year old guy and a 35 year old woman but a two year old boy and a three year old girl. This mall is full of two and three year olds. Many of the fundamental decisions we make every day likely come from our unconscious mind, that is, the unresolved inner child that continues to rule our life until we give it the love and attention it needs and turn towards the Divine, the source of unconditional love. Anyone who has tried setting long term goals knows this to be true. We need to have our unconscious mind in alignment with our conscious mind, or else we inevitably meet an inner saboteur and fail. That is because our unconscious mind is ultimately in charge. Our primary commitments live in the depth of our unconscious, so we had best befriend these in order to evolve.   Most of us live with a buried inner child, held captive by the grip of our ego that is committed to getting limited…

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Ask Parvati 36: Compromise, Acceptance and Getting the Love You Want – Part 5: Getting The Love You Need

GETTING THE LOVE YOU NEED (Continued from Getting The Love You Want)     Relationships are a path for personal growth. In my opinion, they can be a fast track way for spiritual growth. Perhaps some of you have had the experience of feeling great when you are on your own, but when you get into a relationship, all of a sudden you find out all sorts of areas for personal growth as your shadow gets provoked. None of that seemed to exist when you were on your own. So where did it come from? The ego assumes it must be your partner, so you conclude you’re with the wrong partner. Truth is, these vasanas (or negative tendencies) were within you all along and have been simply triggered by the relationship.   Of course, it is healthy to be in a relationship where you find the support and safety you need to explore and ultimately release these vasanas. This is why a healthy relationship is more like a co-creative workshop for spiritual growth than a walk in the park. They amplify our shadow and our potential. They bring out hidden tendencies and show us who we truly are. When we are willing to accept the fuel for growth and let our ego guard down, the workshop…

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Ask Parvati 36: Compromise, Acceptance and Getting the Love You Want – Part 4: Getting The Love You Want

GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT (Continued from Acceptance and Insight)   Intimate relationships can be complex. We say we want to find love, yet we are often attracted to people from whom we find it hard to get what we feel we need. Some psychotherapists suggest that unconsciously, we seek to fix the wounds of our childhood through our intimate partners. It is like we want our mummy or we want our daddy through them. In fact, certain theories suggest that our unseen wounds help us find our “perfect” match. The problem is, the person we find at first to be “perfect”, turns out to re-enact the very pains we experienced as a child. One morning, we wake up to find that we are not in relationship with our ideal mate, but with a replica of our clingy mother or our aggressive father. Then we ask, how did we get here? Unhappy, we push against what we see and inadvertently move into power struggles, trying to fix the other person, who once seemed to fill us up just the way we needed. We think of breaking up and may even choose to do so. Or we choose silent resignation, because, unwilling to risk change, we sum up that this is just the way relationships are –…

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A Life of Charity

A LIFE OF CHARITY I am about to head down to St. Petersburg, Florida where I will be performing to headline the St Pete Yoga Festival. So think of me next Saturday night, October 22nd, and send lots of happy thoughts of fun and delight. I will be sending you the very same. The following day, I will be teaching a YEM: Yoga as Energy Medicine workshop, then a full day workshop that week. Performing is a great joy of mine, sharing the love I have for music, singing through a vibrant array of colours, movement and sounds. I am happy with my show and thoroughly enjoy it. I can’t wait to share the new costumes with you. They are stellar! (Big thank you to Sunanda for that!) Throughout the week, I will be in rehearsal with dancers/yoginis I will meet there. I have never met them before, let alone worked with them. They have been reviewing the choreography for my show, which we will go over and weave together this week, in preparation for the big night. So this week will be full of rehearsals for me, directing, blocking, coming up with alternate choreography, supporting technical lighting work and art directing. Then, on the night, I let all that go and step into the role…

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